October 24th, 2003

MST3K - fish

A Puffy Halloween

Well, friends, I decided to be kind to you and post the first bit of my newwest fic entitled "A Puffy Halloween". It takes place during Halloween in OotP. In which, as we know, absolutely nothing happened.

This will be first in a series of holiday fics that take place in Hufflepuff. The next one, "A Very Puffy Christmas", will be out at some point in December (and I might right a Thanksgiving one too, where Morgan, the ambassador's daughter, forces a Thanksgiving celebration). Then a New Year's one, a Valentine's one, a St Patty's one, and a 4th of July one, in the summer (courtesy of Morgan).

So, without further ado, I present...

Installment One

Brimstone, moon, and Witch's fire,
Candlelight's bright spell,
Good luck shall I now acquire,
Work thy magick well.
Midnight twelve, the Witching Hour,
Bring the luck I seek.
By wax and wick now work thy power
As these words I speak.
Harming none, this spell is done.
By law of three, so mote it be!


The Great Hall had turned bright orange and brown overnight. Rose Zeller stared around at the pumpkin and bat explosion, absorbed to the point that she only noticed her books falling to the ground with the tiny corner of her mind usually reserved for treaties on Ancient Roman aqueducts.

“Move, Zeller,” growled a disgruntled looking fifth year blonde, giving her a slight push. It was just strong enough to get her started forward, legs moving jerkily. She continued on to the Hufflepuff table in a vague dreamy state. Finally reaching the table, thrown to the far right, she went to sit down, only to be stopped by a hand on her shoulder.

“Zeller, your books,” reminded the blonde, steering her towards where she had dropped them.

“Oh, right…” Rose said, bending to scoop them up, stupor slowly wearing off. “Erm, thanks, Zacharias…” she murmured, turning bright pink in embarrassment. Figures, didn’t it. She just would get caught being an idiot by the cutest boy in all the school. The fact that he was only considered so by the Hufflepuff first year girls (and a few of the boys) didn’t really matter. He was still considered so by someone, and therefore this experience was mortifying.

“Whatever Zeller,” Zacharias said, shaking his head. Was everyone this dazed as a first year? He sure as hell hadn’t been! He shook his head once more and headed to the upper end of the table, where Justin Finch-Fletchley was reciting a rather obscene joke about trolls and goblins. “Come now, that isn’t even legal,” Zacharias muttered.

Rose, clutching her books to her chest, stared down at the floor as she made her way to the end of the table, the generally accepted “first year end”. She sat in her usual spot, and set her books down. Then she blinked. There was a letter lying there, addressed to her. Not so odd usually, but the owls hadn’t arrived yet.

Rose –
Meet me at midnight in the North Tower. There is something I need to give to you.

It was written in a picturesque cursive script, and left unsigned by whoever had sent it. Speaking of… Rose lifted her eyes from the parchment and glanced around at those sitting near.

There was Morgan, a girl who, as self proclaimed Dueling Queen of Hufflepuff, was immediately moved to the top of the suspect list. Sandra, Prankster Queen (more of a pain in the arse than anything else) of Hufflepuff, and John Bob Tyler (he couldn’t make up his mind, but most people called him John), her “boyfriend”, were also listed up there tentatively. Otherwise, the only ones sitting at that end of the table were Skye, that Slytherin boy, and a Ravenclaw.

Her mind train stopped. A Ravenclaw and Slytherin, here voluntarily? This could not be!

But, of course, it was. Winston Adams, the Ravenclaw who was within reach, wouldn’t have sent the letter. Not only was it not his style, but Morgan would’ve sacrificed him to a demon goat. She’d already threatened him a few times.

So that the left the Slytherin. Sneaky pureblood brats probably thought it was funny to mess with the mind of a half-blood! Hold on. Narrowing her eyes, Rose looked close at the boy, a tall snake with dirty blonde hair and a rather conniving look.

“Damn, I’m out of suspects.”

“Sush-whur?” came a yawning voice from behind her. She jumped, making a loud echoing squeak. Morgan, across from her, snorted into her Trix (oatmeal transfigured into the sugary sweet cereal by Winston, as any transfigurations attempted by Morgan would likely set the table on fire).

“Slept in again, lil’ bro?” asked the Slytherin, leaning in that oh-so-cool way that Slytherins seem to be born with.

“Yehri dee oouf ai?”

“Just wondering, Rush,” said Wolf Seraphim, correctly interpreting the ‘yes I did Wolf, why’ from his badger brother.

“So, it’s orange.” This, in Morgan speak, was a typical opening for debate. As if someone was going to argue that this giant pumpkin of a room was blue or something.

No one argued with her, and she began to pout. At another time, Rose would have given in and argued against her point, simply so that Morgan wouldn’t whine throughout the day, but today… Another glance, and again, no suspects for this prank, for surely that’s what this was.

Well, that solved it.

“Do any of you know who put this here?” she asked, waving the rather inconspicuous envelope around. It really was innocent looking, a simple manila rectangle, holding inside it a scrap of parchment.

Everyone just looked at it blankly.
  • Current Music
    Simple Plan -- "One Day"
MST3K - fish

*insane giggles*

Just had to post this, and thank the Buffyverse Dialogue Database (http://vrya.net/bdb/).


Lindsey has been called:
Napoleon -- (by Lilah in Episode: Blood Money)
a poor kid who had to do better than anyone else -- (by Holland in Episode: Blind Date)
best and their brightest -- (by Angel in Episode: Dead End)
born-again boy -- (by Cordelia in Episode: Blind Date)
born-again lawyer-boy -- (by Cordelia in Episode: To Shanshu in L.A.)
fun for a human -- (by Darla in Episode: Dear Boy)
guy who understands the big picture -- (by Holland in Episode: Untouched)
handi-capable -- (by Lilah in Episode: Judgement)
pilgrim -- (by Lorne in Episode: Dead End)
the evil lawyer-beast -- (by Angel in Episode: Through The Looking Glass)

Lindsey called Angel:
a barrel of dead monkeys -- (by Lindsey in Episode: Dead End)
a mentally unstable vampire -- (by Lindsey in Episode: Blood Money)
a new player in town -- (by Lindsey in Episode: City Of)
champion of justice -- (by Lindsey in Episode: Reunion)
Mr. Save A Soul -- (by Lindsey in Episode: Dead End)
  • Current Music
    Darling Violetta -- "Angel theme"
MST3K - fish


"Oh be QUIET, Godric. You've been annoying me since the Renaissance!"

"It took me that long?"

"I was IGNORING you before that!"


"All right, I'm thinking of something...black!"

"A badger," three voices chorused.

Helga sniffed. "Well, you don't have to sound like it's so obvious," she said in a hurt voice. "I could have picked something else this time."

"Helga, you've picked that for the past three hundred years," Rowena replied in a long-suffering tone.

"Which would make this the perfect time to choose something else."

"All right, all right. I apologize. What DID you choose."

There was a long pause, then Helga admitted in a very quiet voice, "A badger. But I COULD have picked something else!"

A trio of groans met that pronouncement.

Helga huffed. "Honestly. At least I'm trying! It gets awfully dull around here between Sortings. At least I don't spend all my time sulking over petty grievances."

"I am NOT sulking. Just because I happen to think that Parselmouths are rare enough that I should get first claim--"

"Will you STOP going on about Potter?" Godric snapped in exasperation. "The boy is Sorted. It's done with. I've let YOU get away with stealing some Gryffindors at heart, and you don't catch me whining about it years later. I still say that Snape boy--"

"I'm ignoring you again."

"Good. Now maybe I can get some peace and--"

\\Help me -- help me -- Please help me--//

The Founders were all shocked into silence by the thin voice suddenly pleading with them.

"It's Potter again!" Rowena exclaimed. "I don't think we've ever seen a student this much!"

"Where on Earth are we? And where did a BASILISK come from?!" Helga squeaked.

Salazar coughed. "Er, didn't I mention? Ah...anyway...Ah-HAH! That's what it was about that Weasley girl. I knew Riddle was going to be a problem. That's what I get for taking halfbloods."


"Ouch. Ah, priorities! Keep the boy alive first, yell at me later?" Salazar suggested frantically.

"Oh. Right. Help him fight a basilisk when we're DISEMBODIED VOICES IN A HAT!" Godric shouted.

Salazar hissed. "Why doesn't the boy just try talking to -- Godric, did you just drop a SWORD on his head?"

"Lovely, give the boy a concussion instead of help!" Helga snapped.

Godric protested, "He was supposed to duck!"

"This is the problem with choosing students based on bravery, not intelligence."

"Oh shut UP, Rowena!"

"How does one duck when a hat starts dropping things on your head?" Salazar asked dryly.