November 10th, 2005

MST3K - fish

On today's edition of "Folk Too Dumb to Be Alive (I Wish)":

An idiot on the AOL teen board for "money, college, and careers". She posts:
I want to be a distric attorney. Not a lawyer. lawyers help the guilty. district attorneys help the victems. I really like to watch c.s.i and law and order. I usally watch law and order svu (Special Victems Unit)!!!!! What do you want to be?????

My reply, after beating the crap out of a nearby pillow:
Here's a hint. If you want to become a district attorney, DO SOME RESEARCH. As in, just look up the word instead of hearing it on the single most melodramatic show there is and deciding it's what you want to do.

District attorney = a lawyer. Prosecuting lawyer. That specific job also implies that you're a politician, as it's an elected position.

What you call a "lawyer" = defense attorney and/or public defender. Defense attorneys are paid by their clients, public defenders are paid by the state to represent those who cannot afford an attorney.

Furthmore, you may want to look up this little phrase we have. It's called "Innocent until proven guilty". Guess what that means? If you guessed it meant that everyone represented by a defense attorney or public defender is automatically guilty, you're wrong.

At least you'll never sit on a jury. Voir dire tends to rule out biased parties like yourself.

Too harsh; or not harsh enough?
MST3K - fish

From Entertainment Tonight

A list of the average ages for various TV shows.

29.0 The Simpsons
30.5 The O.C.
31.3 Veronica Mars
32.0 Everybody Hates Chris
35.6 Prison Break
42.6 Desperate Housewives
43.3 Lost
43.7 ER
45.0 Survivor
46.4 House
48.7 Medium
49.1 CSI
49.6 Two and a Half Men
51.8 Without Trace
53.0 Ghost Whisperer
54.0 Commander In Chief