Prompt: #086, Choices
Word Count: ~1000
Rating: PG, for rice-related near death experiences.
Summary: In which Ryan turns into a teenage girl and Max
“We need to have a song.”
Max looked up from his newspaper to stare at Ryan, who had made the dinner that night (part of Max's ongoing conspiracy to make Ryan come up with survival skills). “...what?” He was sure Ryan had reasoning behind his question. Although, this was Ryan they were talking about.
“You know, like other couples. They've got songs. We need one!”
Max nearly smacked his head on the table. Ryan appeared to be well aware that he was acting like a teenage girl, but he also seemed to be in one of those moods where he didn't care. It was a little adorable.
He broke off his thoughts to glower at Kit, who was actually snorting into his bowl of rice. It would have, he thought, been more adorable if it could have waited until the kids had gone to bed. Zack, at least, was blissfully unaware of anything (despite Kit, who had turned out to be remarkably artistic and had made a little illustrated book entitled “Zacky Has Two Daddies”, that had ended with a snowball fight to the death – or at least to the near-frostbite – between him and Ryan). Well, best to get this over with as quick and painlessly as possible. “'I'd Do Anything For Love', by Meatloaf.”
There was an ominous silence, and Max slowly looked up from his newspaper, seeing his life flash before his eyes. (Wow, how on Earth had he not gotten shot for that? And when had he ever thought that was a good haircut?) Ryan was giving him the death glare to end all death glares, and Kit was asphyxiating silently on rice, tears actually streaming down his face. Git, Max thought, and then mentally smacked himself, because he wasn't British and therefore had no reason to use British slang.
“I am going to hurt you badly.” That's always a good response to get from a former cop who wasn't a bad shot (not a crack shot, because he flinched at loud noises, but still not bad. And he didn't flinch when punching people).
Max was starting to get into the conversation now. “'The Sign', by Ace of Base?” It had been the shiny hit song the year they had graduated, and Ryan had gotten to the point that, when at an after-graduation party where it started playing, he started screeching curse words at the top of his lungs and had lunged at the radio. He looked about to do the same exact thing, only with Max instead of the radio. Which was kind of hot, but again – kids in the room. Ryan had terrible timing.
“Seriously, Max. I mean it.”
Max pretended to think for a long moment. “I've got it! 'Whoop! There It Is!'”
Ryan growled. “Firstly, it's technically 'Whoomp', not 'Whoop'. Secondly...” Here he picked up a serving spoon full of rice, stood up, and before Max quite figured out what he was doing, dumped it into his coffee before sitting back down.
He was looking really pissed by this point, so Max tried for an adorable look. “'Loser', by Beck?” he offered weakly. Kit had, by this point, performed the Heimlich maneuver on himself, and was back to snorting into his rice (he had reached the part that was cold and crunchy, and deciding to himself that he was never ever allowing Ryan to cook again, for the sake of his own health).
“As fitting as that is, no,” Ryan half snarled.
It was then that Max got an actual, non-sarcastic and non-likely-to-piss-Ryan-off, idea. “Stay here, I'll be right back.” Seeing the mutinous look on Ryan's face, he promised, “I'm not messing around this time. You'll love it.” With that, Max took off from the table and up the stairs. He knew exactly where the CD he was looking for was (mostly because he'd gotten it for Ryan not too long ago, in his efforts to introduce his boyfriend to the digital age).
He found it easily, and went back downstairs. He had to perform some quite acrobatic motions to keep Ryan from seeing the CD front as he made his way to the stereo in the living room (which was connected, open-air, to the dining room). He had to skip a few tracks, and then turned it up as the song he'd picked started to play. He hadn't actually picked it for himself, but he knew that Ryan got all giggly and high school girl-y over this band (and this song, for that matter), and he guessed he could live with it.
Ryan's suspicious look started to lift as he heard the opening chords, and he was into a full-blown grin by the time the lyrics started in.
“I wanna paint your portrait in bright color/I wanna paint the lines in red and blue/I wanna make your eyes appear like starlings/Saying, 'Darling, I love you'...”
Kit had given up on looking even vaguely neat and buried his head in his bowl of rice to muffle his hysterics. Zack had gotten bored of the antics of grown ups and was making art on the table using salt. Ryan, who would normally be sternly reprimanding his son by this point (and lamenting why, oh why couldn't his son have inherited his light obsessive-compulsiveness?), was busy jumping up from the table and coming over to Max. Max was a little startled.
“C'mon, let's dance!” Ryan was giving him that goofy adorable grin again, so Max had to give in, despite knowing that Ryan had no idea how to dance, and wondering what Ryan was planning to do instead.
This was answered rather quickly as Ryan grabbed his hands and started to perform a mock tango (at least, Max was pretty sure it was a tango; he may be better at Ryan than dancing – hell, a squirrel was better at dancing than Ryan – but that didn't mean he knew any dance terminology).
“So, I'm guessing that was a good choice?” Max grinned at him.
His only answer was a deep kiss, which made Kit groan at them to get a room, and then paused and realize he grossed himself out.